Friday, April 22, 2011

How to Break Into Your House For Free-A Comedy

So last night, I did the unthinkable.  I locked myself out of my house.  So to give you all a laugh, and maybe some hints, here are steps of the night!

1.  After realizing you've locked yourself out, phone the property manager to ask if there's any way he can come to town to let you in.  Find out he is no longer the property manager as owner is back from Columbia, and property manager doesn't know his number.

2.  Shoulder the weakest door-just like the movies....does it work?  Nope...just gives a horrible shoulder ache... (did I mention standing in 2 feet of snow in sandles?)

3.  Find a neighbor with a crowbar-One not home, One refuses to answer door, and one is home.

4.  Find a neighbor who is willing to not just lend crowbar, but help...Done!

5.  While waiting, destroy one screen to see if you can get a window up.  Nope.

6.  Have neighbor check front door again-did I mention the neighbor is a firefighter?

7.  Check out other windows.  Find a window in the kitchen that does open.

8.  Get a lawn chair from the garage.

9.  While he offers, decide it should be you who tries to get through the window.  Note to all:  don't wear a skirt.  Can't get through as scared the skirt will hike up too much.

10.  Let the firefighter do his job and go through the window.

11.  Note to self:  get spare made as soon as you go to the city

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